CD 34

Yes, the Cycle day is right. No, I am not pregnant.

Recap. My final collection had to be delayed due to work. In June I did something I would not recommend and did my collection and then a full days work. My work is reasonably physical and only pain killers and taking it as slowly as I could, got me through it. It really wasn’t too bad…. but like I say… I don’t recommend it.

The lead up scans were promising at the start, number wise, but then one egg follicle decided it was going for gold and developed faster than the others so my collection date was on CD10 instead of the previous two CD13 collections. Thus, the unplanned work conflict.

I was told there would be one- maybe two eggs collected.

They got two. Plus the three I had on ice from the second collection…. gave me a grand total of 5 eggs.

The following week was equally as hard as the injection and collection week. I was on the phone with the lab technicians getting updates on the developing eggs every day or so.

out of the 5 eggs- 4 were fertilised.

Out of the 4 fertilized eggs- one was deemed too low quality to freeze.

Then I was told one that had looked really good from the start was (cell) dividing too fast! (yes, apparently that’s a thing)

Then they all started dividing too fast….

After so much hope I was starting to go slightly insane…. Dr. Google became my dangerous best friend. I have now watched way too many videos of egg cell division and can pinpoint a high quality egg verses a not so good cell division egg.

Finally, I woke up. Literally and figuratively. And just knew I couldn’t  influence these little eggs in the lab and I had to stop torturing myself with information overload. I stopped obsessing.

Then I was informed one of my eggs/ embryo’s was now at a stage where the clinic was happy to freeze. It grading-   5BB      the number is for days along its development and the letters for its cell division quality formation etc. I think ideally you want a 5AA? And they wont take anything lower than DD?

Anyway. I had something!!!

The next couple of days, I was told one of my last two eggs had stopped growing and the final one would also be frozen. Grade 4CC

This all happened over a period of seven days. Saturday to Friday. By the time I got to Saturday I had started to cry…. I don’t think I truly stopped crying for about 36 hours. The whole process was so much more intense and emotionally involved than I ever imagined.Whether you get 20 embryos or just one or nothing….. its so, all involving. And it wont matter how many people you have around you or if you go it alone. Its your body going through the heave ho… the roller coaster ride and the hormone overdrive!! And I was natural modified IVF, so a lower protocol/ medication course than conventional IVF. I can only imagine what its like to do conventional  over and over again.

However, I made myself share what was happening to me, with three people. I talked it out…. cried some more and took several deep breaths… threw that erratic energy into my work… and finally stopped crying.

Two frozen embryos.

The plan (can you hear God laughing at me for even trying to plan again???) was to have a cycle off and then go straight into implantation. I finished my contract, FINALLY!!! I went on a WELL deserved holiday. I did a fertility cleanse  in preparation. I started my implantation medication. I had my first scans and confirmation that my uterus lining was thick enough. THEN………. realised that I had been to a country that was on the WHO Zika infection list. After numerous calls, blood tests and worry, blame, anger……. I was told to play safe and wait the required 8 weeks till my implantation. I stopped the medication that suppresses my natural ovulation. And as yet have not had a period. Hence, CD34.

I am cleansing again. Hopefully I will trigger my period. or more likely I think my body will skip it till next month. And it will be a few days after that starts that I will start with the meds and scans again. I’m really hoping mid/ end of September.

But I’m not planning. Life.

x

 

 

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